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It’s difficult to balance one self, for example I’m a very passionate person. When I get involved in an issue, or organization I truly dedicate myself. However, my weakness is that I sometimes take it to the extreme. At one point, or maybe I’m still going through it, I was passionate about feminism. I was all about not getting married, not believing in fathers walking down their daughters down the aisle, hating cheerleading and hating girls that didn’t value themselves.

I was so passionate I became hateful, sort of. I was just very anti things. As I calmed down, I learned that marriage could be a sweet thing, but be careful it isn’t slavery. I learned to not roll my eyes when tios asked me to serve them food when they were closer anyways (they’re old afterall). I learned that cheerleading takes athleticism, but it sends the wrong message when cheering on boys in short skirts. One thing I stay very passionate about is changing my last name, if I ever (by some miracle, or concussion) I get married I will not change my last name. I know girls spend hours in schools doodling their boyfriend’s last names afters theirs, I never had that…pull and I don’t understand why I must change. After all the woman has to (if she decides to) carry babies, give birth and take care of them. Most likely she will do most of the cooking, cleaning and taking care of the bigger baby aka the husband for her life. But after all of that, she has to take his last name? It used to represent that the husband owned her like an object.

I remember seeing a photograph of a headstone that said, "RIP Mrs. Dr. Goodsmith" It was an oldie, about the 1800s. What was so depressing is that on her headstone there was nothing about her, even death she belonged and represented her husband.

I wish to represent myself even in marriage.

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Comment by cloud.eah on August 26, 2010 at 7:51am
Bravo! High Five and you go girl! I feel the same i decided to keep Escobar but have always rejected my mom's maiden name Lopez. I decided to start using Escobar-Lopez and then i got married to a Lopez so it stayed Escobar-Lopez. Its kinda dumb though cause for example to use his credit card or to call in his behalf i have to say Lopez not Escobar. But I agree actually my cousin's baby has her last name not the dads and they are together. jeje cute huh! I LOVE IT! Also, i feel the same as you, I found myself angry and bitter towards every inequality but I have learned I get no where let's create a change in ourselves before changing the world no? :D


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